Sao Abridged Qoutes

 

In the realm of anime, “Sword Art Online” stands as a monumental franchise, captivating audiences with its rich virtual worlds, intricate narratives, and unforgettable characters. Yet, lurking in the depths of the internet, there exists a creative gem – “Sword Art Online Abridged.” This fan-made parody takes the epic tale of Kirito and Asuna and transforms it into a rib-tickling, irreverent experience that will leave you laughing out loud. Amid the laughter and satirical twists, it’s the quotes that truly steal the show, cleverly reimagined and delivered with a dash of humor that fans of the original series will appreciate. In this journey, we delve into the world of “Sword Art Online Abridged Quotes,” where every line is a humorous nod to the series we know and love, while simultaneously poking fun at the quirks and intricacies of the virtual world within.

 

 

Best Sao Abridged Qoutes

 

1. “I reject my humanity, Kirito!” – Kayaba Akihiko
2. “Man, this game is so realistic; I can even feel my boobs jiggling!” – Asuna
3. “It’s like someone’s playing the world’s sh*ttiest game of The Sims and we’re all just NPCs.” – Kirito
4. “Kirito, you can’t just solve all your problems by stabbing them.” – Asuna
5. “Did you guys miss the part where I said it was a murder?” – Kirito
6. “You can’t just make everything better by hugging it out, Kirito.” – Asuna
7. “I have a strategy! It’s called ‘running away’!” – Kirito
8. “And what the f*ck is wrong with a feminist ending?!” – Asuna
9. “For the love of gaming, Kirito, no!” – Asuna
10. “You know, Kirito, you’re a lot like Jesus. You saved the day, but you can’t save your love life.” – Klein
11. “Kirito, I think you’re just terrified of making any meaningful emotional connection with another human being.” – Asuna
12. “Asuna, what’s this ‘online’ you speak of?” – Kirito
13. “I’m going to stab you so f*cking hard.” – Kirito
14. “Okay, here’s a comprehensive list of things I can’t do: give a sh*t.” – Asuna
15. “I mean, if it’s between dating you and falling face-first into my own pile of sht, I’m gonna have to go with the pile of sht.” – Asuna
16. “Kirito, don’t worry. I’m sure one day, you’ll find someone who doesn’t care about your tiny dick.” – Klein
17. “Oh, what? You think your mom is gonna walk in and tell us to stop f*cking? ‘Cause I promise, that’s the last thing she’s gonna say.” – Asuna
18. “Dude, you should totally join the Knights of the Blood Oath. They’re like, way better than us.” – Klein
19. “Look, Kirito, I just don’t think it’s gonna work out. You’re emotionally constipated, and I don’t want to deal with that sh*t.” – Asuna
20. “Kirito, why don’t you just ask him, like, ‘Hey, Kayaba, did you just kill a bunch of people?'” – Asuna
21. “I’m just here for the plot.” – Kirito
22. “I’m not like those other girls; I don’t want a man who’s all talk and no action!” – Asuna
23. “You see, Kirito, while you were running around being a tool, I was actually doing something productive with my time.” – Klein
24. “I mean, if you’re gonna talk sh*t, you might wanna do some research first.” – Kirito
25. “Ah, yes, the two genders: sandwich and dishwasher.” – Kirito
26. “You know what they say, Kirito: the couple that kills together stays together.” – Asuna
27. “The cardinal rule of gaming: don’t be a dick.” – Klein
28. “Klein, can you not? I’m trying to be a supporting character here.” – Agil
29. “If I could murder someone with my mind, Klein, you’d be dead right now.” – Kirito
30. “Asuna, you’re basically my old mentor, but hotter and not as dead.” – Kirito
31. “If you listen closely, you can hear the sound of your social life ending.” – Kirito
32. “You know, Kirito, there’s a word for people like you: douchebag.” – Asuna
33. “Balls deep in counseling and therapy.” – Kirito
34. “No one’s asking you to commit to a long-term relationship with the dude. Just…do something that doesn’t involve stabbing.” – Asuna
35. “Wait, you want me to go full anime on these guys?” – Kirito
36. “I’m like the anime version of Captain Planet.” – Kirito
37. “You know what they say, Kirito: Sharing is caring!” – Asuna
38. “Kirito, this isn’t a video game! You can’t just press ‘exit’ and expect everything to work out.” – Asuna
39. “What would Jesus do, Kirito? He’d be f*cking nailed to a cross is what!” – Asuna
40. “Honestly, you two are so perfect for each other, you’re both just total dicks.” – Klein
41. “Asuna, I just want you to know, I’m never gonna pull out.” – Kirito
42. “Look, Kirito, just because you think the world is sht doesn’t mean you get to be sht to other people.” – Asuna
43. “Klein, you’re like the human embodiment of cringe.” – Kirito
44. “Kirito, if we don’t make it out of this, I want you to know, I f*cking hate you.” – Asuna
45. “What is it with guys and their need to be the hero, huh?” – Asuna
46. “I don’t know if we’re friends or not, but I don’t hate you enough to let you die.” – Kirito
47. “Well, now that we’re dating, I guess I should tell you the truth: I’m a dude.” – Asuna
48. “We’re here to kick ass and chew bubblegum. And we’re all out of ass.” – Kirito
49. “I didn’t log out, I was forcibly disconnected by an old man who’s apparently into bondage.” – Kirito
50. “Klein, you’re like the herpes of friends.” – Kirito
51. “It’s called a panic room, not a panic-crawl-space!” – Asuna
52. “I’ve been stuck in a death game for two years, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.” – Kirito
53. “Sugou, if you’re listening, you’re a real piece of sh*t.” – Kirito
54. “Hey, I thought this was supposed to be a death game, not a f*cking daycare.” – Kirito
55. “Why do I always have to carry your sorry ass, Klein?” – Kirito
56. “Who are you calling basic, b*tch?” – Kirito
57. “You should take up smoking. It’s not healthy, but it makes you look cool.” – Kirito
58. “I can feel the testosterone levels in this room dropping by the second.” – Asuna
59. “No, Kirito, there is a third option: not being a complete tool.” – Asuna
60. “Kirito, I’m not gonna date you, but I’m also not gonna let you die.” – Asuna
61. “I’ve got a sh*tload of healing potions, and I’m not afraid to use them!” – Kirito
62. “I’m not the damsel in distress; I’m the b*tch in shiny armor.” – Asuna
63. “I told you, Kirito, I’m not here to make friends. I’m here to stab things.” – Asuna
64. “I’m like an onion, Kirito. I’ve got layers.” – Asuna
65. “What’s the point of life if you’re not just a little bit of a dick?” – Klein
66. “I can’t believe I’m risking my life to save you, you giant piece of sh*t.” – Asuna
67. “I’ve got a feeling that Kirito’s a little too fond of his sword.” – Asuna
68. “If we’re going to die, at least I’ll have the pleasure of watching you go first.” – Kirito
69. “Oh, no, it’s a three-way! I’m the filling in a gender identity sandwich!” – Kirito
70. “You’re right, Kirito. You’re just so much better at everything, and I’m just a big bag of suck.” – Asuna
71. “I swear, if you don’t shut up, I will stab you.” – Kirito
72. “Let’s just face it, Kirito, we’re both emotionally constipated.” – Asuna
73. “I can’t believe I’m saving your ass. I should be saving someone less useless.” – Asuna
74. “Kirito, you’re like a cckroach. You just won’t fcking die.” – Asuna
75. “Oh, look, it’s the world’s sh*ttiest Power Rangers.” – Kirito
76. “Wow, you’re like the John Wick of killing mood, Kirito.” – Asuna
77. “I’ve been through hell, and I’ve got the scars to prove it.” – Kirito
78. “Why do you always have to be such a little sh*t, Kirito?” – Asuna
79. “You know what, Kirito? I’m gonna go fight this boss and live, just to spite you.” – Asuna
80. “You’re such a pain in the ass, Kirito, but you’re my pain in the ass.” – Asuna
81. “Let’s go, Kirito, to the land of less suck.” – Asuna
82. “If you die in the game, you die in real life, and I really don’t want to die a virgin!” – Kirito
83. “You don’t get a harem by telling the truth, Kirito.” – Asuna
84. “Kirito, are you gonna be a little b*tch, or are you gonna be a man?” – Klein
85. “Don’t make fun of me, Asuna. My mom dressed me.” – Kirito
86. “I don’t have a problem with people with tails; I have a problem with people with tails that are assholes.” – Kirito
87. “I don’t need a sword. I can kill someone with my crippling sense of self-doubt.” – Asuna
88. “I don’t know how to feel about that, so I’m just gonna say, ‘You’re welcome,’ and then we can move on.” – Kirito
89. “I’m like a fish, Kirito, but instead of water, I swim in a sea of existential dread.” – Asuna
90. “Why do I keep getting stuck with the weirdos?” – Kirito
91. “Oh, great. I’m stuck with the guy who thinks he’s in a spaghetti western.” – Asuna
92. “Kirito, you’re like a cat. A big, dumb cat.” – Asuna
93. “I’m the best player in the game, and I don’t even know how to play.” – Kirito
94. “Klein, don’t you dare follow me into the bathroom.” – Kirito
95. “Klein, just because I have tits doesn’t mean I have to be the one to cook.” – Asuna
96. “I’m not your therapist, Kirito. Find someone else to dump your emotional baggage on.” – Asuna
97. “Oh, look, it’s the Abridged Knights of the Plot Convenience.” – Kirito
98. “I didn’t come here to be emotionally manipulated, Kirito. I came here to stab things.” – Asuna
99. “Why do you always have to be such a buzzkill, Kirito?” – Klein
100. “I’m not here for your emotional baggage, Kirito. I’m here for the loot.” – Asuna
101. “Kirito, you can’t just solve all your problems by hiding in your man cave.” – Asuna
102. Klein, you’re like that one character who just can’t stop talking about how much he loves his guild.” – Kirito
103. “Kirito, you’re like that one guy who thinks he’s the best player in the game but isn’t.” – Asuna
104. “Klein, you’re like that one person who tries to make ‘fetch’ happen.” – Kirito
105. “Kirito, you’re like that one kid who never got over his emo phase.” – Asuna
106. “Klein, you’re like that one neighbor who always mows his lawn at 7 AM on a Saturday.” – Kirito
107. “Kirito, you’re like that one driver who can’t merge onto the highway at a reasonable speed.” – Asuna
108. “Klein, you’re like that one coworker who reheats fish in the office microwave.” – Kirito
109. “Kirito, you’re like that one guy who brings his acoustic guitar to parties.” – Asuna
110. “Klein, you’re like that one person who uses way too many hashtags in their social media posts.” – Kirito
111. “Kirito, you’re like that one friend who can’t take a hint when it’s time to leave.” – Asuna
112. “Klein, you’re like that one relative who always asks when you’re going to get married.” – Kirito
113. “Kirito, you’re like that one sibling who borrows your stuff without asking and never returns it.” – Asuna
114. “Klein, you’re like that one ex who won’t stop texting you.” – Kirito
115. “Kirito, you’re like that one pizza delivery guy who can never find your apartment.” – Asuna
116. “Klein, you’re like that one telemarketer who calls during dinner.” – Kirito
117. “Kirito, you’re like that one door-to-door salesman who won’t take ‘no’ for an answer.” – Asuna
118. “Klein, you’re like that one Jehovah’s Witness who shows up on a Saturday morning.” – Kirito
119. “Kirito, you’re like that one student who reminds the teacher about homework.” – Asuna
120. “Klein, you’re like that one alarm clock that just won’t shut up in the morning.” – Kirito
121. “Kirito, you’re like that one app that constantly drains your phone battery.” – Asuna
122. “Klein, you’re like that one YouTube ad that you can’t skip.” – Kirito
123. “Kirito, you’re like that one pop-up window that won’t close.” – Asuna
124. “Klein, you’re like that one captcha that you can never quite read.” – Kirito
125. “Kirito, you’re like that one buffering symbol that ruins your streaming experience.” – Asuna
126. “Klein, you’re like that one spinning wheel of death on your computer.” – Kirito
127. “Kirito, you’re like that one traffic jam that makes you late for work.” – Asuna
128. “Klein, you’re like that one long line at the grocery store when you’re in a hurry.” – Kirito
129. “Kirito, you’re like that one dropped call on an important phone conversation.” – Asuna
130. “Klein, you’re like that one lost sock in the laundry.” – Kirito
131. “Kirito, you’re like that one missing puzzle piece that ruins the whole picture.” – Asuna
132. “Klein, you’re like that one melted ice cream cone on a hot day.” – Kirito
133. “Kirito, you’re like that one flat tire on a road trip.” – Asuna
134. “Klein, you’re like that one pen that runs out of ink in the middle of an exam.” – Kirito
135. “Kirito, you’re like that one expired coupon when you’re trying to save money.” – Asuna
136. “Klein, you’re like that one hair in your food at a fancy restaurant.” – Kirito
137. “Kirito, you’re like that one cracked phone screen that you can’t stop looking at.” – Asuna
138. “Klein, you’re like that one stain on your favorite shirt that won’t come out.” – Kirito
139. “Kirito, you’re like that one lost remote control that you can never find.” – Asuna
140. “Klein, you’re like that one piece of gum that loses its flavor too quickly.” – Kirito
141. “Kirito, you’re like that one sock that always goes missing in the laundry.” – Asuna
142. “Klein, you’re like that one notification that keeps popping up on your screen.” – Kirito
143. “Kirito, you’re like that one email in your inbox that you just can’t bring yourself to read.” – Asuna
144. “Klein, you’re like that one app on your phone that you never use but can’t delete.” – Kirito
145. “Kirito, you’re like that one puzzle piece that doesn’t fit anywhere.” – Asuna
146. “Klein, you’re like that annoying NPC who just won’t shut up.” – Kirito
147. “Kirito, you’re like that one stain on your favorite shirt that just won’t come out.” – Asuna
148. “Klein, you’re like that one sock that always goes missing in the laundry.” – Kirito
149. “Kirito, you’re like that one piece of gum that loses its flavor too quickly.” – Asuna
150. “Klein, you’re like that one notification that keeps popping up on your screen.” – Kirito
151. “Kirito, you’re like that one email in your inbox that you just can’t bring yourself to read.” – Asuna
152. “Klein, you’re like that one app on your phone that you never use but can’t delete.” – Kirito
153. “Kirito, you’re like that one puzzle piece that doesn’t fit anywhere.” – Asuna
154. “Klein, you’re like that annoying NPC who just won’t shut up.” – Kirito
155. “Kirito, you’re like that one stain on your favorite shirt that just won’t come out.” – Asuna
156. “Klein, you’re like that one sock that always goes missing in the laundry.” – Kirito
157. “Kirito, you’re like that one piece of gum that loses its flavor too quickly.” – Asuna
158. “Klein, you’re like that one notification that keeps popping up on your screen.” – Kirito
159. “Kirito, you’re like that one email in your inbox that you just can’t bring yourself to read.” – Asuna
160. “Klein, you’re like that one app on your phone that you never use but can’t delete.” – Kirito
161. “Kirito, you’re like that one puzzle piece that doesn’t fit anywhere.” – Asuna
162. “Klein, you’re like that annoying NPC who just won’t shut up.” – Kirito
163. “Kirito, you’re like that one stain on your favorite shirt that just won’t come out.” – Asuna
164. “Klein, you’re like that one sock that always goes missing in the laundry.” – Kirito
165. “Klein, you’re like that one piece of gum that’s been chewed on for way too long.” – Kirito
166. “Kirito, you’re like that one itch you can’t scratch.” – Asuna
167. “Klein, you’re like that one song that’s stuck in your head, but you can’t remember the title.” – Kirito
168. “Kirito, you’re like that one voicemail that you can’t delete.” – Asuna
169. “Klein, you’re like that one typo in an important document.” – Kirito
170. “Kirito, you’re like that one sneeze that never comes.” – Asuna
171. “Klein, you’re like that one stain on the carpet that you can’t get rid of.” – Kirito
172. “Kirito, you’re like that one leaky faucet that won’t stop dripping.” – Asuna
173. “Klein, you’re like that one burnt piece of toast in the toaster.” – Kirito
174. “Kirito, you’re like that one door that just won’t stay closed.” – Asuna
175. “Klein, you’re like that one nail that sticks out and always snags your clothes.” – Kirito
176. “Kirito, you’re like that one piece of broccoli that nobody wants to eat.” – Asuna
177. “Klein, you’re like that one USB cable that only works if you wiggle it just right.” – Kirito
178. “Kirito, you’re like that one DVD that skips in the middle of the movie.” – Asuna
179. “Klein, you’re like that one mosquito that won’t stop buzzing in your ear.” – Kirito
180. “Kirito, you’re like that one piece of gum that’s lost its flavor but you keep chewing anyway.” – Asuna
181. “Klein, you’re like that one app on your phone that you can’t uninstall no matter how hard you try.” – Kirito
182. “Kirito, you’re like that one leaf blower outside your window early in the morning.” – Asuna
183. “Klein, you’re like that one alarm that goes off just as you’re about to fall asleep.” – Kirito
184. “Kirito, you’re like that one cat that knocks over your stuff for no reason.” – Asuna
185. “Klein, you’re like that one shopping cart with a wobbly wheel that just won’t go straight.” – Kirito
186. “Kirito, you’re like that one pen that runs out of ink right in the middle of an important note.” – Asuna
187. “Klein, you’re like that one ice cream that melts too fast on a hot day.” – Kirito
188. “Kirito, you’re like that one elevator that takes forever to arrive when you’re in a hurry.” – Asuna
189. “Klein, you’re like that one public restroom with no toilet paper.” – Kirito
190. “Kirito, you’re like that one Wi-Fi signal that’s just out of reach.” – Asuna
191. “Klein, you’re like that one loose thread on a sweater that unravels the whole thing.” – Kirito
192. “Kirito, you’re like that one car that won’t start when you’re already running late.” – Asuna
193. “Klein, you’re like that one checkout line at the store that’s moving at a snail’s pace.” – Kirito
194. “Kirito, you’re like that one neighbor who always plays loud music late at night.” – Asuna
195. “Klein, you’re like that one bird that won’t stop chirping outside your window at sunrise.” – Kirito
196. “Kirito, you’re like that one hair that keeps falling in your face no matter how many times you brush it away.” – Asuna
197. “Klein, you’re like that one gum on the sidewalk that you accidentally step on.” – Kirito
198. “Kirito, you’re like that one vending machine that takes your money and doesn’t dispense anything.” – Asuna
199. “Klein, you’re like that one song on the radio that plays on repeat all day.” – Kirito
200. “Kirito, you’re like that one traffic light that always turns red just as you approach it.” – Asuna

 

 

Final Words;

 

As we step out of the playful and comical world of “Sword Art Online Abridged Quotes,” we reflect on the laughter, parodies, and clever reimaginings that have graced our screens. These quotes are not just amusing one-liners but a testament to the boundless creativity of the internet community. In their absurdity, they remind us that humor can be found in even the most serious of narratives and that a fresh perspective can bring new life to well-established stories. While the “Abridged” series takes a lighthearted approach to the adventures of Kirito and Asuna, it also pays homage to the original, offering fans a unique way to experience the beloved world of “Sword Art Online.” In these final words, we celebrate the power of humor, satire, and fan-driven creativity that breathes new life into our favorite stories.